Avoiding The Ex (an excerpt from the Multiply post)

“Good boy fell for the bad girl. Bloody story.”
“Absofuckinlutely.”
“Why are you avoiding him anyway?”

I don’t know! I DON’T KNOW!!! Five years ko ng hindi alam ang sagot! It was natural for the first two years for me to avoid him. He knew that I wouldn’t even entertain the thought of us being friends. I wanted to avoid the drama. I wanted to avoid the possibility of hurting him more. I loved him. I reaaaaaaallly loved him. I was madly in love with him for almost three goddamn years. And now I act as if we were never together. As if magic never happened. As if we never fought for what we had.

Whenever someone would ask me what our relationship was then like, I’d always say, “Beautiful.” I guess I just want to remember it that way. I want to remember him as someone I really loved and as someone who really made me feel loved. I guess I’m just scared that if I welcome him to my life again, things will just get messy… ugly.

Hence, I will avoid him this whole lifetime.

And just wish that he’s also much happier now.

—–

listening to: Al Green – Let’s Stay Together¬†

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