All posts for the month August, 2008

To my bitch in shining armor…

Belated happy birthday to my soulmate, eternal curse, loveofmylife, bestfriend, and bitch in shining armor rolled into one.


I love you so much, Donnie.

I miss you and I can’t wait for October for your uber late celebration. I know you’re busy, too busy to even read this. But if by some stroke of luck, you see this, let me just remind you that you are one year closer to marrying me.

Remember the deal I had with your Dad? If we reach 39 and we’re still both single, you would have to marry me. I know you are contemplating suicide when you reach 38. Mwahahaha.

—–

listening to: Geri Haliwell – Circles Round The Moon

3 Comments
by Iya Santos on August 26, 2008  •  Permalink
Posted in Friends
Tagged

Posted by Iya Santos on August 26, 2008

https://psychosomaticaddictinsane.wordpress.com/2008/08/26/to-my-bitch-in-shining-armor/

You know you’ve reached fiction hell when…

A pretty albeit not breathtaking highschool transferee falls in love with a gorgeous vampire who first avoids her with utter repulsion because her scent is the most potent amongst humans then pursues her when he decides he could not endure immortality without her.

Vampires are not only cold and hard as a stone, strong and quick as a bullet. They don’t get reduced to ashes but they glitter like diamonds when exposed to sunshine!

You haven’t recovered from the glimmer fiction factoid when you also find out that each vampire has a gift. Their best characteristic in their human life becomes intensified when they become immortal! If one is at best intuitive in his mortal life, he will be able to see the future once he becomes a vampire!

A coven of vampires swears to protect human life. So instead of sucking people’s blood out, they opt for animal blood. Wow, in the same light as vegetarians, only with more heart!

The main female protagonist not only associates herself with vampires. She also befriends werewolves. She becomes bestfriends with one. And get this, the bff werewolf also falls in love with her.

Werewolves imprint. Imprinting is like finding your soulmate, only way creepier. A teenage werewolf can imprint on a two-year old and take care of the baby until she is old enough to have a labeled commitment with.

The mortal female protagonist asks the immortal male protagonist to make her a vampire. He refuses because he does not want her to miss out on the varied important events of her finite life. He gives his yes in one condition, she should marry him first.

The annoying and asinine heroine refuses at first because she does not quite believe in marriage, since her parents are divorced. She gives her yes when she learns he will only have sex with her after they wed.

The heroine delays her immortality by reasoning she’s not yet ready to give up her perishable life. She says she wants to attend college first. The real reason: she’s afraid that sex will not be as good once she’s in eternal form.

You know you are still in fiction hell when…

The ditz gets pregnant and she gives birth after a month to a half-vampire baby who has the ability to communicate by sending images to people’s minds through touch.

The werewolf bestfriend imprints on the half-vampire baby! The vampire-turned heroine attacks the bff werewolf for naming her child after the Loch Ness monster.

Royal vampires from Italy come to destroy the baby as it poses as danger to the secrecy of their race. The baby’s immediate vampire family and her werewolf friends protect her.

The final showdown has two of the most dangerous fictional creatures known to man yet they resort to a peaceful agreement with the realization that the hybrid child is not a threat.

The royal vampires return to Italy. The werewolf bff waits for the hybrid child to reach her full growth for concrete imprinting.

The hero and the heroine talk about forever and have more vampire sex.

The heroine realizes that vampire sex is more gratifying than human sex.

And you realize it’s the Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer.

—–

Despite the aforementioned, I have no regrets reading Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, and Breaking Dawn. In fact, I liked Twilight, but only because of two things. One, Robert Pattinson (Cedric Diggory in Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire) will star as Edward Cullen in the film adaptation and I can hardly wait for December to watch it. Two, if I were Isabella Swan, I’d also have a difficult time sacrificing my sex life.

No regrets, but I had more pleasure reading a chapter of Harry Potter than the entire Twilight Saga. JK Rowling can kick Stephenie Meyer’s ass.

Anne Rice can go for the kill.

—–

listening to: Coldplay – Scientist

10 Comments
by Iya Santos on August 20, 2008  •  Permalink
Posted in Books, Humour
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Posted by Iya Santos on August 20, 2008

https://psychosomaticaddictinsane.wordpress.com/2008/08/20/you-know-youve-reached-fiction-hell-when/

Things that I said I’ll do but don’t get around doing

Make my cursive handwriting as purtee as a computer font

I want my i’s dotted impeccably. I want fluid strokes in the loops of my g’s and p’s. I want my t’s crossed out with precise horizontal straight lines. I want the size consistent and the stance only a wee tilted to the right.

To feed this compulsion and obsession, I will rip off any page that will not adhere to my computer font dream.

Get my contrary-to-popular-belief lazy ass out of Luzon

According to the stars (and people who think they know me but don’t), people born under my sign, Sagittarius are suckers for travel, may it be an aimless journey or a creditable expedition. I am blaming it on my cusp that I do not fit the usual Sagittarius make-up. Sorry kids, Isabela’s the farthest I’ve set foot in.

I convinced Jap and Yo to spend an adventure trip with me next summer in Bora or Davao or Cebu or Bohol or anywhere in Southeast Asia… anywhere!

One suggested we go to Palawan. I said yes. And to my dismay (and geographical obtuseness), I realized that it’s still part of Luzon.

Unleash my creative skills. Yes, skills, not talents.

I don’t wake up with a story in mind that can flow like blood from pen to paper. I don’t have the brilliance of a renaissance artist to put stick figures in canvass and make them look like poetry in colors.

However, I do believe that I am not so inept when it comes to writing and painting, so I will create to please the minority of my audience. I am that minority. I shall create for my own gratification. Watch me not care.

Watch ASAP Live and declare my love for John Lloyd Cruz.

Funny huh? Not all things funny are jokes. I will really do it. Sorry, it’s just the inner showbiz commoner that’s hankering to get out. So if you love me– if you reallyreallyreally love me– come watch ASAP with me and act as the leash that will prevent me from jumping on Lloydie.

But at least, allow me to blow a kiss to Papa P! Haha.

Praise and worship a la alive-alive-alive-forevermore.

This is not a joke. I do miss the high of being around people speaking in tongues (shamana shamana) and singing with sheer holy joy about their faith. I have no qualms being Catholic, but I don’t let my religion tie my relationship with the Supreme Being down.

Much as I trust my own faith, it wouldn’t hurt to upgrade it through waving my hands in the air and losing myself in the revelry of His ways.

I’d really appreciate it if any of my readers will invite me to a day of praise and worship. Don’t be scared. What you heard about me is not true. I am not Satan’s spawn. Even if I were, set you mind to enjoy the challenge that is moi!

That’s all for now. There are still a lot of things I want to do that need execution. I will blog about them when I am sure to be equipped with the drive and the commitment essential to achievement.

This entry will be my contract. The publish button, my signature.

—–

listening to: Gabrielle – Dreams

14 Comments
by Iya Santos on August 18, 2008  •  Permalink
Posted in All About Me
Tagged ,

Posted by Iya Santos on August 18, 2008

https://psychosomaticaddictinsane.wordpress.com/2008/08/18/things-that-i-said-ill-do-but-dont-get-around-doing/

Metrowalk * 081608

Last night was Metrowalk night with Besty Eunice. I had an awesome, awesome time! It sucks that we hardly get girltime lately. Oh well. The addition of Marc and Patchu last night didn’t really spoil the supposedly estrogen filled night out. Boys are amusing, especially when they talk about poker terms that I don’t understand and why Richard Gutierrez is better than Dingdong Dantes. Weh? Wtf.

Hell yeah. Last night was awesome awesome weird odd! :p

The noisiest people in Aruba * Maitai and Wengweng * Why the hell are we talking about Richard and Dingdong?

Yo with the other Donnie (hahaha) * Sick Genius Marc and Human Counter Me * Happy little punks in Good Earth

I need another night like this.

(Panawagan: Jap, Donnie, Colleen, Levi, Joel, Oryx… mga leche. Sumama kayo sa susunod. Yo and I miss you loads.)

—–

listening to: Rihanna – Disturbia

6 Comments
by Iya Santos on August 18, 2008  •  Permalink
Posted in Home, Places
Tagged , , , , ,

Posted by Iya Santos on August 18, 2008

https://psychosomaticaddictinsane.wordpress.com/2008/08/18/metrowalk-081608/

Expelliarmus!

EC: Margaux just had the funniest dream. Bwahahaha. I still can’t get over it.
Julie: What did she dream about?
EC: That she was accepted in Hogwarts, and that the Sorting Hat placed her in the fifth house.
Julie: Fifth? Wait, there are only four houses. Gryffindor, Slytherin, Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff…
EC: She dreamt that she’s in Tinky-Winky!
Julie: Tinky-Winky ampotah. Bwahahahahahahahaha!

That’s pretty much the conversation I heard 8 years ago that got me reading the Harry Potter series. I got tired of hearing my barkada talk about fictional names and places that I had zero inkling of. I wanted to join the trivial fun of house wars and spell casting.

I went to National Bookstore in ATC and bought books 1 and 2, Harry Potter and Philosopher’s Stone and Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. I finished the book in less than 24 hours. After a week, my Tita Vina sent me hardbound copies of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban and Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, books 3 and 4. Needless to say, there was a phase in my life that I was Harry Potter-obsessed. A phase when I had to first say Lumos! before I switched the light on, called every smartypants Hermione, and muttered Aveda Kedevra! when I came across exes.

My besty Donnie made up silly (unsuccessful) rumors that he’s the real author, not JK Rowling. He told me JK stands for JoKla, a substandard manipedi homosexual who stole his idea. JK phoned one night and Donnie told him he’s writing a story called Harry Puta. Because JK’s phone was analog, the signal was crappy and he asked in confusion, “What Donnie? Har-ry Pot-tah?”

“JK, you’re an idiot. It’s Harry Puta. Pu-ta.”

“Oh, Ha-ry Pot-tah. Harry Pot-tah!”

Yes, yes. The series was the source of my joy and laughter. I was passionately absorbed. I wanted to kill the Dursleys especially horse-faced Aunt Petunia. I wanted to go to Hogsmeade and Diagon Alley. I wanted to befriend Hagrid so that I could try to tame a hipogriff and teach Fang some tricks. I loved Albus Dumbledore and his nondirect words of wisdom. I adored Cedric Diggory and I shed a tear when he was murdered by Voldemort in book 4.

And.I.Loathed.Cho.Chang. I think it was because of her that I stopped reading. I just felt she wasn’t right for Harry. Imagine my absolute disgust when I heard Heart Evangelista was selected to play Cho in the film.

It was only last week when I decided to read the last three books. See, when I was stuck in Morong I couldn’t watch the telly because of the power failure and I couldn’t go out because of the typhoon. I read book 3 again and the Hogwarts magic came alive once more. When I went back to Manila, I downloaded ebooks of the last 3 and finished reading in less than 3 days.

My eyes still hurt.

So there.

Haha, I really only wanted to share that my eyes are giving me discomfort again. I just couldn’t resist sharing the Tinky-Winky and JoKla stories as well.

—–

listening to: The Wombats – Bleeding Love

9 Comments
by Iya Santos on August 15, 2008  •  Permalink
Posted in Books
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Posted by Iya Santos on August 15, 2008

https://psychosomaticaddictinsane.wordpress.com/2008/08/15/expelliarmus/

I blame Jap’s iced coffee for this.

Here I am at Jap’s desperately trying to do something productive when I should be getting some shuteye.

I’ve been awake for almost 24 hours and I still don’t show any signs of drowsiness. Kahit pahapyaw na hikab, wala. My intuition tells me my bestfriend put a teaspoon and a half of methamphetamine in the iced coffee she gave me along with the dulce de leche cake. She probably needs me to stay awake to watch her sleep, make sure nothing bad (or worse) will happen to her. You see, she just had a seizure and banged her face to a piece of forgotten furniture. Now, half of her face is swollen and her left eye looks as if it had been hit by Pac Man. Told her I’d be glad to balance off her features. Sapakin ko na lang ‘yung kabila. She didn’t seem to like the idea. Magdownload na lang daw ako ng ebooks.

Thanks to µTorren, I now have the complete Twilight series. Also Harry Potter. Plus Madonna’s Sex (book, you idiot). I’m still deciding which Neil Gaiman book I should try. Maybe I won’t read Gaiman at all. Hmmm… how about some Ayn Rand? Summon imagination or summon objectivism?

Perhaps I will summon a Chippy! I also have V-cut here. And Coke! Junkfood breakfast is love.

Got around watching in YouTube what I tried to avoid since I knew of its existence. It wasn’t as bad as I thought. The feeling, I mean. Seeing her wretched face did not upset me. Even the kiss she gave him was not enough to make my stomach hurl. Still looks like a deadfish to me.

Bought this month’s Cosmo Phils issue. Waste of money. Same pretentious shit. For the life of me, I can’t figure out what made me buy something with Angel Panganiban as cover girl. Oh well. Hi, I’m Iya the sporadic idiot!

I arrange my clothes according to size, except my undies. I arrange them according to color. Most are black.

I like Obama but I prefer Clinton for the presidency. I just think people held by prejudice would still prefer to respect a woman than a colored man.

The last two has got nothing to do with the rest of the entry. Lack of sleep makes me random.

I like non-linear narratives, too.

I better wake Jap up. I’ve been blogging this nonsense for more than three hours.

Time for my second (non-junk) breakfast!

‘Pag kulang sa tulog, ikain na lang.

—–

listening to: PCD – When I Grow Up

5 Comments
by Iya Santos on August 10, 2008  •  Permalink
Posted in All About Me

Posted by Iya Santos on August 10, 2008

https://psychosomaticaddictinsane.wordpress.com/2008/08/10/i-blame-japs-iced-coffee-for-this/

Best-Laid Plan

I realized over the weekend that it would be best if I just stay close to my intimate circle. It’s not that I don’t want to gain new friends or expand my social sphere. It’s just going to be for a moment, or as soon as I can re-explain to myself the meaning of forgiveness and redefine what trust is.

I also realized from my musings at the beach in a stormy, gloomy Sunday afternoon that nowadays, I am strongest and bravest when I am alone. I open myself to vulnerability (and pain) when people are close to me. I reckon my strength does not come with courage lately. I guess something in me has changed and I don’t like it.

I used to think that I can be strong yet vulnerable.

There is no room for any form of weakness now.

I must be fierce.

So I will fiercely love. So I will fiercely live.

I will hold my loved-ones closer. I would not seek any more or go on looking for any less.

For now this is the only way I know how to manage.

I know I am right, and this will keep me strong.

—–

listening to: the weekend happenings on replay

9 Comments
by Iya Santos on August 5, 2008  •  Permalink
Posted in All About Me, Drama

Posted by Iya Santos on August 5, 2008

https://psychosomaticaddictinsane.wordpress.com/2008/08/05/best-laid-plan/

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