Best-Laid Plan

I realized over the weekend that it would be best if I just stay close to my intimate circle. It’s not that I don’t want to gain new friends or expand my social sphere. It’s just going to be for a moment, or as soon as I can re-explain to myself the meaning of forgiveness and redefine what trust is.

I also realized from my musings at the beach in a stormy, gloomy Sunday afternoon that nowadays, I am strongest and bravest when I am alone. I open myself to vulnerability (and pain) when people are close to me. I reckon my strength does not come with courage lately. I guess something in me has changed and I don’t like it.

I used to think that I can be strong yet vulnerable.

There is no room for any form of weakness now.

I must be fierce.

So I will fiercely love. So I will fiercely live.

I will hold my loved-ones closer. I would not seek any more or go on looking for any less.

For now this is the only way I know how to manage.

I know I am right, and this will keep me strong.

—–

listening to: the weekend happenings on replay

Advertisements
Previous Post
Leave a comment

9 Comments

  1. we tend to realize a lot of things when alone. i’ve had more than my share of alone time. it felt nice albeit a little sad. i hope it doesn’t stay that way.

    you deserve a hug.

    Reply
  2. maybe being around tons of books this September will help! 🙂

    Reply
  3. dati i abhorred being alone.
    these days, alone or with people, inner happiness rocks hard meyns!

    🙂 wish that for you iyaiyayow!

    Reply
  4. live as if it’s your last day on earth.

    love as if you won’t get hurt.

    be happy ‘cos there’s always a reason to be.

    bow.

    🙂

    Reply
  5. 😀

    im not alone. the voices in my head are keeping me company.

    (ano daw? hehehe)

    Reply
  6. hala iya, what are the voices saying? share naman oh, baka divine prophesies yan. or you’re being called to be a nun na. hehehe.

    Reply
  7. i used to be extroverted.. but nowadays, i enjoy spending a lot of time with myself. haha!

    i hope you find what you’re looking for.

    Reply
  8. Finch

     /  August 10, 2008

    moment of solitude 😉 we all need that

    Reply
  9. right.

    thanks. 🙂

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: