Last night, I slowly nibbled on a chocolate bar while I patiently waited for the clock to strike 12. I wanted to greet the beginning of the last month of the year with FUCK YOU, WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG? But when the minute hand landed on the hour hand, I forgot all about my favorite expletive and just let out a sigh of relief.

HELLO, DECEMBER. YOU ARE FINALLY HERE.

Please remind me why you are my all-time favorite month.

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listening to: a medley of Christmas carols